With Z-Day come and gone the undead have taken their place as the top of the food chain. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, as one of the last few survivors you have the unenviable task of rebuilding the human race and civilization.
So the first step in rebuilding civilization ought to be food and shelter and other such goodies. But how can you even begin when there are shambling dead all over? Well the obvious answer is this...put them back in their moldering graves! Simple enough. We know that severing the spinal column or massive trauma to the brain are excellent ways to kill a zombie. So now that we know that much we need to clean them out of their hidey holes one at a time. In clearing a residence of the undead there are a few simple things we need to keep in mind.
Just because a residence is huge and imposing, such as a prison, school, church, or other large stone building, doesn't mean it's ideal. Just think a moment, the bigger the building the more areas inside where you need to check for the living dead and the longer it will take to clear it out and be confident that you got them all. The last thing you need is a Zed who lost his legs hiding in a closet or under the sink where it can nibble on you after you think you got them all.
So, when you pick a house think small and defensible. You might want to consider a small two story house in a suburban or rural area. It's usually a good bet that most urban areas would have been more heavily populated and therefore more Zombified post Z-Day. Once you've chosen a structure take a good long look at it. Zombies aren't usually going to be standing at the windows moaning and waving hello.
So since you can't exactly just look for the former inhabitants you'll have to go in ready for anything. A good first step here would be to do what you do now when you go up to a stranger's house. (No! You don't kick the door in and start blasting away.) You knock! This could be useful for more than one reason. There might be other survivors inside and when you knock they know you're not a zombie so they don't shoot you. If there are zombies shambling around within they should be antagonized enough by the knocking to begin moaning or moving about. Then you can hear them and be prepared. Now check and see if the door is unlocked, no sense breaking the door if it's already unlocked. This is a time where being familiar with a lock pick would do nicely as well.
Also before you go inside think about what you're wearing. You don't want to go running around in shorts and a crop top and classy sneakers, no matter how sexy you might feel doing it. And if you're a dude, honey, it's not sexy just sad. For the ladies though there's good news. In addition to your normal tactical gear and body armor there's a secret weapon for you. Ashley Williams (famous for killing deadites in the Evil Dead series of films) has created an anti-zombie bra. (Patent Pending. But grab one. And guys...don't grab one, seriously.)
Once you're inside you might want to put away that shotgun and yup, the sword too. Great as those can be they won't help you at all in close quarters. If you have a backup piece like a pistol, knife, machete, or short bludgeoning object then that's your best bet. (You won't often run into a zombie who can do karate so that's one less worry. Unless you happen into the wrong house and run into Zombie Liu Kang.)
You may not have enough room to maneuver those longer weapons and if a zombie pops out of a closet (or comes out of the closet when you're there) you might want something that's going to work better at close quarters. Once you're inside the house and have a proper weapon use your brain! Check every nook and cranny of the house. Don't neglect the basement, the attic, under the sink, the cupboards, the closets, the dog house. A Zombie could be hiding anywhere.
You can never be too careful when it comes to cleaning out the place you're going to occupy. You never know when you're going to run across a zombie who'd had a little too much Mexican and has holed up in the bathroom. Also, do not do a random room search, go room by room and floor by floor, this decreases the possibility of missing a Zed.
While you're at it also consider that when entering a house you intend to claim it may already be inhabited and not by the living dead. There are deaf people and mutes who may not be able to respond to your knocking. There could be shell shocked survivors who have gone semi-feral. If you can, try to convince these unfortunates that you mean them no harm. An extra pair of hands might come in useful one day. Also, keep an eye out for politicians, they can seem like Zombies in the way they move and the way they act but they are usually alive. But don't go easy on them, politicians are just as dangerous as the Zeds, (OK, they're worse) put them down with extreme prejudice before they try to convert you or extort campaign funding.
Once you've got your home secured, the steps to the second floor need demolished and replaced with a retractable rope ladder, the doors and windows securely blockaded, then it's time to set up your distractions. Don't be afraid to go simple, most Zombies aren't that smart and will fall for just about anything. Put a sign in the front yard advertising appetizing brains just down the road or next door. Now you should be set, hole up, keep someone on watch at all times.
Remember you heard it here first, now.....SURVIVE THIS!
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